I just missed Sportscenter's top ten for this so you people better appreciate me:
So I just need to get this off my chest, Im sure many of you, especially the girls, have experienced some of this first hand. I go to the gym quite a bit, and here are some of the things I ponder while on the elliptical for an hour wanting to shoot myself..
1. Girls who wear only sports bras to the gym: WE GET IT! You think you are hott, chances are you probably are, but come onnnn the gym isn't over 100 degrees, there is no need to wear that little clothing. You aren't making me feel bad about myself, I'm just judging you from my elliptical because you look retarded. There is no point, the guys aren't checking you out. They are too busy checking themselves out in the wall of mirrors or other guys. This brings me to my next point.
2. Guys checking other guys out. Try and make it a little less obvious next time you check each other out while pumping iron guys. I cannot tell you how many guys I watched in a one hour span do this. I mean I get it, you don't wanna feel inferior, so you wanna check out the competition. Well I'm going to let you in on a little secret: us girls are checking you out, because watching the Vandy Tennessee game wasn't entertaining the first time around let alone the second time its playing on ESPN, so obviously we watch down in the weight room instead.
3. Guys wearing hats to the gym. I just don't get it! What purpose does wearing a hat to the gym serve? Is your hair messed up? Do you have a bald spot? Honestly when Im checking you out from above I'm not even looking at your face/ head. Is it a ploy to look a little more decent while sweating profusely? When I go to the gym Im not worried about what my hair looks like, and neither should you. I would understand this if you were running outside, but you are inside, you aren't trying to block the sun, so leave the hat in your car the next time you walk into McComas, because you just look ridiculous.
4. Wearing full sweats to work out in. What are you trying to make weight for high school wrestling or something? Its February, I understand, but its called layers people. You look stupid in full sweatpants and a sweatshirt or jacket zipped all the way up when you're exercising INSIDE. Its called a thermostat, and the employees at McComas do a pretty dandy job of keeping it a somewhat tolerable temperature. You literally make me sweat more by just watching you attempt to work out with an extra 10lbs of clothing on. So take the extra 2 seconds to put some shorts and a t-shirt on under your sweatsuit and do us all a favor.
5. Wearing soccer jerseys to the gym. Its even better when you and your buddy are in matching Ronaldo jerseys, that was the highlight of my workout. I didn't know it was twin day? Sorry to break it to ya GDI's, but wearing Ronaldo's jersey isn't going to help you look anything like his sexiness. In my opinion its only acceptable to wear a soccer jersey during the world cup or if you're foreign, unless youre attending a jock jams/ jersey themed social, and then i am just shaking my head at you in disappointment because you didn't have a football/ basketball jersey to sport, or even worse..you chose to wear said soccer jersey over a football/ basketball one, and then I'm just judging your morals.
Well thats about it for my ranting about the gym. My weekend starts tomorrow thank all that is holy. Sorry to those of you who did not acquire Duke tickets in the lottery, it happens to the best of us, but oh wait, I have a ticket anyway. You win some you lose some folks. Im sure you'll have as much fun watching it in the comfort of your own home. I was being totally sarcastic about that.
Have a lovely thursday you filthy animals.
HB
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